Dec
14th
Sun
14th
Chuck Norris could make @ChuckObama cry like a baby. 100% Chuck always beats 50% Chuck.
Sep
20th
Sat
20th
Chuck Norris eats nails for breakfast, old leather boots for lunch, and those little dogs that girls carry in purses for dinner.
Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay’s potato chip.
Chuck Norris CAN get some satisfaction. And he doesn’t have to try, or try, or try, or try.
Ha @standupcomedy is a girl.
Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
The universe began when Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked nothingness in the face.
There’s no space bar on Chuck Norris’s computer. Words automatically give him space.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris couldn’t IMAGINE there was no country, nothing to kill or die for… so he punched John Lennon in the face.
